TwoTeenageDaughters

So, I just spent a boat load of money on christmas gifts for them. that would be older teen and younger teen getting most of what they wanted. mom and dad getting a few token gifts. older teen and younger teen loved the gifts. everyone is happy, happy happy for about a week. then frowns start to appear, slowly. small whinning noises made to friends via muffled cell phone conversations, barely heard over the constant blaring of hiphop and rap songs coming from their rooms.

Then at the stroke of midnight on jan. 1, something strange happened. the clock started ticking on some kinda new shopping period. nobody told me. early warning systems totally useless.
Older teen daughter is the first to make the request for more stuff on jan. 3 or 4. it goes something like this, "umm, dad, could i have some money to go shopping and hang out with my friends, and umm, get some food at the boulevard."

Here I was thinking a modest christmas ( about $1200 in gifts) followed by a three day trip to chicago (for them) would be enough. i was so wrong.
So, i said to older teen daughter, "umm, didn't i just spend large chunks of money on christmas, followed by your trip to chicago, then paid for your very expensive tuition. do you think you could leave me alone and let me enjoy the financial catastophe that is my wallet."

She scatts away back to her room, favoring me with an air of supreme displeasure and frowniness, with an ample measure of putdown-ness and yousostoopid-ness. Kinda like the look you would give your shoe if you stepped on a dead slug, left out in the sun for three days too long.
Back, she goes, to the blaring hiphop music with the bad lyrics and repetitive beats, back to the cell phone, back to the door of her bedroom that should never be opened unless you have gifts in hand. Later, I go up to her room and ask her how was her day. Round up the usual answer, "fine".

Meanwhile, younger teen is up to her own bag of tricks. Not unlike a deranged hobbit, or should I say, totally like Gollum, she has started whinning that she needs to go to the hairstore to get some new rings. That would be bigg, soupbowl sized ear rings. And, while I'm there getting these ear rings, can't I please, please, please just buy her a few things she so desperately needs, like makeup, jewlry, handlotion, eye shadow, hairbrush, fake nails, lip gloss, bobby pins, hair grease, hairgell, vaseline, fingernail polish, hairbands.
Did I leave anything out? Of course, I did. She also wants a trip to CVS to get some of the same stuff but also a CVS card, more lip gloss, deodorant, bodylotion, shower gel, and a phone book.

She asks for each one of these thing one at a time, so I'm forced to answer No about 25 times in a row. Like a crazed answering machine. Dad, i need to get some hair grease. NO. bobbypins. NO. makeup. NO. earrings. NO. fingernail polish NO......sometimes I says yes. Handlotion. Yes... really dad, I can get handlotion, then I switch back to NO. It's crazy, but I'm no fool. I know how this works. Get dad to the store and I can just pile on 5 or 6 things when he's not paying attention.

Finally she gives up and goes back to her room. Out blares the hiphop and rap music, on flips the cell phone. From behind closed door, i hear the constant blingtring sound of AOL instant messenger.
Her friends have to know just how lame her dad is.....